Hello

on Friday, December 17, 2010
Originally posted here on November 10, 2008.

Don't you dare pick up the call!
Starring: Sharman Joshi, Gul Panag, Sohail Khan, Amrita Arora, Isha Koppikar, Sharat Saxena, Dilip Tahil.
Director: Atul Agnihotri.


And I thought Chetan Bhagat’s One Night @ The Call Center would make a good movie. After all, it had everything packed into it-from love, to deceit, to a gripping storyline-all with a pinch of the spiritual. Coffee-book spirituality, as I put it. But then, out came this movie, and a friend dragged me along for it. And…SHIT!!! This is by far the most atrociously bad movie I have ever seen. The screenplay (by Atul Agnihotri and Chetan Bhagat, himself) is jerkier than a ride on an Agra by-lane, the music by Sajid-Wajid is only melodious to deaf ears, and the acting is just blah…
The story, in a nutshell, revolves around a group of call center employees, each bashed up by life in someway, who one night, get a call from God. So, you have Shyam (a below par Sharman Joshi) and Priyanka (hammy Gul Panag), ex-lovers who are trying to now co-exist in the same office space; Esha (Isha Koppikar, in the worst get up in movie history), a wannabe model and victim of the casting couch (oops, that was a spoiler. Go back, and try not to read that last line); Vroom aka Varun (Sohail Khan, trying and falling on his bum too hard), the cool dude who’s after Esha; Radhika (whiny Amrita Arora), a sati-savitri whose hubby dear (Arbaaz Khan) is cheating on her; and ‘Military Uncle’ (Sharat Saxena, bringing all his ‘acting talent’ to the fore), a grandpa trying to connect with his grandson by sending him pics of apes. Thrown into this is the double-crossing boss, Bakshi (played VERY loudly by Dilip Tahil), some very cheesy songs (one of which, also features, for no apparent reason, the cheating hubby dear) and the Sharman-Gul ‘steamy’ scene, which is actually much ado about nothing. Really, the Censor Board should show much more maturity, and stop creating such a furore about such idiotic things.
Oh, and, how can I forget the cameo-ing couple? Salman Khan, though hogging every hoarding in sight, has a 2 minute bit role, cameo-ing as himself, and looking older than my great grandfather. Katrina Kaif, as the narrator/God, looks divine, but even in the bit role she has, can’t act for nuts.
Overall, this is such forgettable fare, that miss it at any cost. If a friend insists on dragging you along (like was the case with me), say sorry, and kill that ‘friend’. Oh, and, if you ever happen to meet Mr Atul Agnihotri, please, please convince him to give up filmmaking…

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